They had been married for such a long time and she still loved him, not with youthful ardor but with something better; with the deep warmth of her soul. She thought, "We're two and yet one. And after being together all these years I'd be terribly lost without him, as if I'd only be half of me. How does the Good Book describe it? Oh yes! 'The two shall become one.' That's us, and that's not a bad thing!" She smiled and nestled her head on his shoulder. "Everything is so wonderful," she thought, "except ... "
"Dear?" she cooed. He grunted. "Dear," she said, "I know before we met that you worked in the government for a while." "Hmm," he replied. "And you asked me to never ask you why you left the civil service. Still, we've been married so long, surely you can tell me now."
"Well," he sighed, a long, deep sigh, "well, I didn't quit. I ... I was fired."
"What?! How could that happen? Why would anyone ever let you go?"
He sighed again. "I'm afraid if I tell you that you ... well ... you might want a divorce."
Her eyes grew wide and she stared up at him in absolute amazement. "Honey! Don't be silly! How can you even think that? I love you! I will never, never, never, ever want a divorce! You hear me?"
He hesitated. "All right, I'll tell you. You know how information is often leaked to the press by an anonymous source?"
"Sure, honey."
"Well, part of my job description was to be one of those unnamed sources. See, if we wanted information released but it would be inappropriate or awkward to release it officially, my job was to leak it to the press. Naturally, all this had to be coordinated with my superiors. You can understand that it was vitally important to keep them in the loop."
"Of course, dear."
"Well, one time ... the last time ... the information was so big, I was so excited, that I leaked it without seeking complete prior approval from above. Huge mistake! I caused a lot of damage by not keeping my superiors in the loop. Heads rolled, and one of them, of course, was mine."
"Oh," she cried, "my poor angel! My poor, poor angel!"
"Well," he said, "that was so long ago. Still, I guess it just goes to show that the old adage is true."
She stared into his face with sympathy and love. "What adage is that, my dear?"
He smiled at her and said, "That I should loop before I leak."
She kept her word. She did not file for divorce. Instead, one day weeks later, as they strolled hand in hand beneath a gorgeous blue sky, serenaded by the chirring of cicadas, she reached up, gently kissed his cheek, and shoved him over a cliff.
